Wednesday, 9 June 2010

Blog No. 73.

Yet again the gaps have appeared between entries. I have had a lot going on, indeed I did. Mainly my adventure to Brighton with my sister to spend 5 days in the company of Alan and various other friends who made efforts to see us either through coming down from London, (Garry and Billy) and friends who live there (Sarah and Tobi). It was wonderful seeing you all. Really it meant so much to me that I could see you all.

I must give a shout out to Alan, my ex well we split up about 8yrs ago and now are close friends. Alan allowed us to stay in his very glamorous Beach front apartment. It was like a step back to a royal apartment with hints of modernism. The chandeliers and memory foam beds and modern kitchen and royally decorated living room, well fit for two queens. It is here we would call home and I loved it.

Alan's flatmate Chris is a very nice and sweet guy and my only wish was to get to know him a bit better. I was on painkillers with which I cant drink so I missed out on his and others company through this. Believe me Guys I really wanted to have fun with you but in my circumstance I can't

Alan as usual was the most wonderful host. Taking us for dinner to the marina and driving us about and telling us where to go in the day. Guiding me to the kids section in Brighton's H & M where I could get some new clothes and ones to fit me at that. That has been a bit of a nightmare I tell you when shops sizes don't go down small enough so you have to try the kids section. I kind of like it as kids have cool style these days so I am grabbing a piece of the action and at the no VAT rate too. £5.99 for jeans can't moan and tops just as cheap.

OK before I end up ranting about kids clothes I just want to say. Thank you to all of you in Brighton, who came to Brighton and who I met in Brighton for making my stay very comfortable, very much fun and relaxing at the same point. Was the mixture I was needing it really was.

By time of coming home I had been almost everywhere and it took its toll on me. Each walk visit, attraction tired me out so did walking. But was worth it. But I won't lye. I was looking forward to getting into my own bed and surroundings. but those 5 days in Brighton where heaven so again thanks to all of you who where there and participated.

Now on a serious note. I have decided to come off and change my pain medication. I am on oxycodon in two forms A) Oxycontin. is a 12 hour continuous release tablet and B) Oxynorm. Is a quick acting version of this to get to pain and stop it instantly and very effective at it it is too.
These painkillers are stronger than morphine. They do work getting rid of my pain, but with such power comes side effects. I couldn't handle them. The effects I had where... irritability, rash, unable to urinate, feeling of being detached, feelings of unreality, loss of appetite, night sweats, constant drowsiness. I mean one or two I could have dealt with. so over two days I decreased the dose.

But today I seen my doctor and she changed me to co-codomol which hasn't helped with pain %100 but it does help. I have a total lack of energy and no lust for life. I almost feel like I am evaporating. I have no control over how I feel and believe it or not, I have been writing this since Monday and it has taken until Friday to get this far.

I feel it's important for me to keep up this blog. I started doing something good for me with this but the past while I have been finding it so hard to keep up with. I know there's a lot of people who like to read this and to you I am sorry I haven't been doing it daily. Once I am back up and high kicking I will be doing it daily.

I don't know if I have mentioned the alkaline diet to you before. I am about to start it this weekend. It has so many beneficial effects, and cancer can't survive in alkaline conditions. Sounds a bit off the wall but there is so much evidence to support it works. It means being very strict with my food and drinks, no more sugary drinks. You are allowed once a week to take a night off and give into temptation.

Other ways it improves your life is by giving you energy, takes away sugar cravings, takes your body to its natural optimum weight and basically just makes you feel amazing. In the USA they recommend very highly to cancer patients and people who have grade 4 cancer like me who are "incurable" have been cured.

It's my best chance. A very sweet go go dancer called Mia Cher also recommended to me to try vibrational medicine. Her family had there own success story through using this so I am still researching this and going to get in touch with the lady in Inverness who practices this to get more information.

I am not dead yet and still have some tricks up my sleeve but right now everything is so hard for me. I have a wheelchair on standby to get out and about this weekend, but I feel that's giving up if I use it. So we will see. I am going to try and eat tonight as this is the last night I am able to everything I want before my organic alkaline diet starts.

So my thought of the well... week?

If you had to pick your food for one last day what would you pick?

Peace, Love and alkaline batteries


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