Friday, 16 July 2010

Blog No. 81.

So I have just realised that I am 3 months into what was basically given in not so many words a 6 month life sentence. It's strange as apparently in 3 months poof and I go up in a big explosion of purple glitter, and enter the next plane. Well F**k you as I am getting better and stronger, and there's no way I shall be gone for a long time, and that's not me being brave it's how I actually feel inside.

I now have a new set back. My right lung/rib is in agony. I literally feel like I have been kicked by a horse then beating up with by baseball bats after. I can hardly breath in and can hardly move my right arm, the pain goes right up into my neck and even the morphine I am on isn't making a difference.

So I am waiting to see if I can be admitted into the Marie Curie hospice for a few days to be looked at and looked after in a nicer environment than a hospital. It's a hospital but a bit more like a hotel. My fingers are still numb and so are the soles of my feet so I don't know if any of this is related. I hope there's something that can be done and quickly as I don't really want to become a prisoner of pain again.

Just when I was doing really well too. But this is just a little set back and I am not really worried about it being something major. I am sure I will be right as rain in a few days but i just want this pain to go away. But most of all these numb fingers they're making it a trifle hard to actually type.

I am going to go and pack my hospital bag and smile smile smile as they say. Kind of short and sweet today, almost like me except I am tall and mean GRRrrrr!!!

So my thought of the day is...

Fox's Viennese bisckwits or Giant cookies?

Peace love and crumbs in bed!!!

3 comments:

  1. Paul, you might be tall but you're so not mean!
    You gave us a great 'last party at Bloc' and if I may say, you handle your pain very gracefully. BTW, every time I play your cd, I'm bouncing off the ceiling - a VERY thoughtful gift indeed…
    So, numb thumbs or not, this blog is tremendous. Can't believe the NHS won't provide you with a secretary… (LOL!) Surely there must be a Barbara Cartland fund or some such so you can recline on a chaise eating grapes whilst an expert typist records your memoirs! - Heck, I'll do it for you P!
    Peace, love, painkillers… and Fox's Viennese!
    Marina x

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  2. awh hahhaha baby thank you i had to bow down gracefully i am in this hospice and a lot has happened so I better get typing I guess xxxx

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