blog No. 8.

Yesterday evening a very amazing friend of mine started a healing circle for me. I was given a task to do and it took a lot out of me to focus my attention on something. I find focussing hard mainly because i am so tired. Reading at the moment is out of the question as i just forget the last sentence I read. But I did try and managed to do well and I felt quite nice after doing it. I have to imagine a ball of violet light protecting my liver. I have to ask my angels for help too. I will be doing this and I cant thank my friend enough for all her help and advice.

So today I feel so tired and my whole body aches but I will get whacked out on dihydrocodene and and have a ball to myself.

I am going to go to a place called the maggies centre in Glasgow. Its a place where they offer lots of different services and treatments for people with cancer. They do cookery courses, dealing with cancer workshops, complimentary therapy's, counselling and art classes.

All the stuffs free which is a bonus. Hopefully I will find something there I can go and do.

Would be nice to have something to do so I can feel normal for a couple of hours.

Hopefully its not full of old people making cups of tea. And hopefully its not depressing.

I would normally avoid going to this type of place as I feel being surrounded by illness can make you worse. But this time I actually feel like it will be a good idea and will help me.

I guess only one way to find out.

Yesterday the district nurse came out to change my dressing on my PICC line. So i now have the glamorous sharps bin that makes a home a home in glasgow.

I better watch the sharps bin incase people on the street think we're getting above our station.

Today my mouth is quite sore each day its getting worse. My tongue is real tender. It feels like its going to explode in ulcers. Its one thing I cant stand is ulcers. I feel them coming out in my tongue and the roof of my mouth. I have a horrible mouth wash which tastes like cow dung to use on it though.

Why can't they make any of this easy?

So i know today I am gonna be a grump. Sore mouth and me don't mix.

So as I sit here waiting on my ulcerated lisp to arrive i will leave you with todays thought....

would you give away your last rolo?

peace love and rice krispies...

xx