blog No. 12.

So all day i was excited for going the pub (bar bloc+) where i used to dj. When I went at about 9.30 I had butterflys. Cant believe I was excited about the pub. I had a great wee hour. I even managed to have an alcoholic drink or 2 but no more. I had sailor jerry rum and coke. Was to little glasses of heaven. I already know I am now a cheap date. As i was a little merry after.

A good thing happened tho. I got offered my old club night back and we have sorted out to do when I am on my good week. So anyone from glasgow come to bar bloc on march 13th and I'll show you what dj'ing is. and if you font know me i will give you wee list of who I have played with in london.

mutya,

sam sparro,

skin (skunk anansie)

V V brown,

Kissy sell out,

dan guliesspie sells, (the feeling)

siouxsi sioux (what a legend)

there are many more but I only give out samples.

I am really lookig forward to doing what i love again. It might be tough but as far as I am concerned it will be worth it. A night of my normality. Which is pretty weird so yeah as bruciey would say..... come on down.

I managed to sleep last night as a doctor came out to see me and gave me lorazepam. I was out for about 10 hours and it was heaven. I have eneough for tonight til i go to my docs tomorrow to shout at them about the meds they gave me.

I found out those meds could have been quite harmfull to me as the decrease your white blood cells. which is what chemo does too. But to add to that could have made me really ill. So i need to drag my sister along to make sure I dont go to crazy. Also getting my second swine flu jab tomorrow. Thats going to be fun.

I also got a mouthwash for my ulcers which numbs the pain away. It works straight away and lasts 3 hours or so, Its heaven. I think I could become addicted to it because the feeling of relief it gives is indescribable. Heaven in a glass bottle me thinks.

I feel like I am on a bit of a journey to myslef to show that even tho I am sick I am still me. I do have to change a hell of a lot. But if little bits of me can still come out then i think i will be ok.

The thought of dj'ing again fills me up with hope that I can still have some sort of life and will be able to see all my friends while I am doing it.

I am going to do some cleaning today how exciting so i will now leave you with my though of the day...

if you where chocolate would you eat yourself?

peace love and musique

xx