Saturday, 27 March 2010

Blog No. 43.

Well today I am feeling a little and I mean a little more alive. Not exactly jumping around but able to sit up at least. I am just constantly bored. Bored of being sick, Bored of one T.V. programme turning becoming another. One hour becoming the next.

I just wish it was all over and I could have a Long break from treatment. I want to do stuff loads of it so really need to think what I want to do when I am well Enough. I fancy another cruise and jetting off to Miami.

I can feel the sun on my face sometimes. When i think on it long enough I can just feel it. It feels war and nice and like I am human. I keep not feeling human. I almost just feel like a shell who at times becomes alive and gets to be a diamond for just a short while, a real short while then I am empty again.

I feel like that most of my life I have been this being of light and I have shone. I have done more with my life than I could write about tell you about or even show you. I lived it to the full. I now feel like a star but one who's light is slowly is fading and every now and again I get to be the brightest one in the sky for just one night then I have to turn my glow down.

Imagine being the brightest star shining with all the bright stars and then your light is being extinguished and no matter how hard you try or want to brighten yourself you cant glow. that's Kind of how I feel.

Who stole my light?

I have shone on many people and many people have shone on me and never again will I get to be so bright but always remember me as that shining star I was, not the shell I have become.

I guess I just shone too much to soon but I wouldn't change that.

My thought of the day

How brightly are you going to shine?

Peace love and stars baby


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