Dint know how it makes me feel, I hope the scan me and say its all been a mistake stop the treatment now, But it doesn't work like that. I wish it did tho. Could you imagine how amazing it would be if I had miraculously healed or that it was a mistake. I could just live again. No more chemicals being pumped into my veins, forced down my neck no more hospitals no more being sick.
JUST NO MORE.
As I am at the stage of no more. No more of any of it. I am currently thinking of stopping the chemo in the next few days. I cant do it anymore. I don't want to feel like this anymore I do want to feel alive and leave my life to fate, but I need to think about a little more like how quick would i die and what the other outcomes are.
But I just don't want this anymore, I really want them to give me good news. Maybe after this scan There will be some. I really need it or I am going to snap. Or explode I don't know but whatever ones bigger. I will do it.
I am looking forward to seeing Jodie today he's a theme and a gossip and knows what witches want. I also have the beau coming over today and he's accompanying me while I support Robots In Disguise tonight. Can't wait.
I am going to go and and brush my teeth and get ready.
My thought of the day?
Do you think I will get my miracle?
Peace love and C.T. scans